Its hard to love yourself these days. We live at a time when our thoughts and lives are shared more publicly and broadly than ever, and when we can always be looking into others’ lives and all the (apparently) super-amazing things they seem to constantly be doing – it is REALLY easy to feel less-than-confident. Darn-you internet!

But, there are also a number of things you can do to gain some confidence back! It may take a bit of courage and a hint of motivation to go against the norm, at least at first, but it will be SO worth it once you start to love yourself more than ever.


Love Yourself - Play

1. Play

You are being the most authentic version of yourself when you play.  You forget about all the “shoulds” and “have-to’s” and you become more YOU.  When you take time to play you are saying to yourself “I’m worth it.”  How often do YOU play?

Love Yourself - Make Others Feel Good

2. Make somebody feel good

When you make someone else feel good about themselves, you’ll feel good too.  Two birds, one stone!  And it can be really simple; email someone who you appreciate and tell them why, or mail someone a nice card (yes, old-school mail).

Love Yourself - Journal

3. Keep a Kick-Ass Journal

Every day, write down one or two ways that you “kicked ass” that day.  It can be as simple as, “I gave up my seat on the bus” or “I finally made that call I’ve been procrastinating” or “I got some exercise today.”

Love Yourself - Mirror Affirmations

4. Mirror Affirmations

With a non-permanent marker, or lipstick, write a positive affirmation on your mirror.  A new one every week!  “You’re gorgeous” or “People love you” or “Look out world, here I come!”  Whatever will get you excited in the morning.

Love Yourself - Spend Time Alone

5. Spend time alone

Most people avoid spending time alone because they’re scared what they’re going to uncover! But time alone allows you to fall in love with yourself again. It allows your thoughts and intuition to filter to the top. It allows the real you to come out. Go for a walk, go to a movie alone…you don’t always need other people around.

Love Yourself - Speak Your Mind

6. Say what’s on your mind

Most people avoid expressing their opinion or desires because they feel they’re not worth it.  The more you speak up, the more proud you become of who you are, the more you realize what you stand for, and the more you attract the RIGHT people into your life.

Love Yourself - Meditate

7. Meditate!

Meditation is an incredible way to love yourself more because it literally involves spending time just exploring the self. In many ways, meditation has you spend time with yourself the way you would with a good friend. You are taking the time to listen to what’s been up, what’s new, and what you want for yourself. This allows you to become intimately familiar with your thoughts, feelings, worries, wants, needs, and more. This can feel scary or intimidating for people, usually because we all worry we won’t like what we find if we start digging into the self, but we promise you – there is no better friend in the world, and more more important a relationship, than you are for yourself.

For free guided meditations, as well as a BUNCH of useful videos to help you start up a meditation practice, check out Kernel of Wisdom‘s YouTube channel here. Or, a lot of people also like starting out using Headspace (though it is subscription-based and, therefore, costs $$) or

Love Yourself - Hobbies

8. Start that hobby – and have some fun doing it!

You know, that thing you’ve always wanted to try, but haven’t “found” the time.  You have to MAKE the time.  Because you’re worth it!  Put your needs ahead of others for once and start that hobby that excites the hell out of you.

I also want to note that READING JUST FOR FUN can be part of this. We often feel so pressured to spend every waking moment being “productive” that we forget to relax. Grab a book that interests you and read it!  Whether it’s a trashy romance, a comic book, a magazine, or your favourite type of fiction. Turn off the outside world and escape into a book and get in touch with your true self.

Love Yourself - Find Good Friends

9. Surround yourself with people who lift you up

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”  Do your friends make you feel good about yourself?  Do they lift you up, or bring you down?  Spend more time with the lift-you-uppers and ditch the bring-you-downers.

Love Yourself - Live a Healthy Lifestyle

10. Exercise & eat well

How you treat your body is an indication of how much you like (or dislike) yourself.  So treat your body like a temple!  Your brain and your attitude will follow.

Well, there are definitely a BUNCH of ways to love yourself more – but we hope this gives you a good place to start.

Learn more on this and other courage-related topics in Billy’s book “Your Comfort Zone is Killing You” (available here). Or get in touch with Billy at

Have a courageous day!